Awkward conversations, scripted.

Five things that make any chat easier

1. 1

   Pick a side-by-side moment

   The car, a walk or cooking dinner. It's easier than sitting face to face.

2. 2

   Start with curiosity

   Ask what they think before you tell them what you think.

3. 3

   Listen first

   Let them finish. Count to three before you reply.

4. 4

   Stay calm

   If they see you panic, they'll stop telling you things.

5. 5

   Say thanks

   Every time they tell you something, thank them. It keeps the door open.

Find the words

Pick their age, then what you want to talk about.

1. How old are they?

2. What's on your mind?

Say this, not that

• Not:"Why were you on that?"

  Try:"I'm glad you told me. What happened?"

• Not:"Give me your phone."

  Try:"Can we look at this together?"

• Not:"You should know better."

  Try:"Anyone can get caught out by this."

• Not:"I told you so."

  Try:"That sounds hard. How can I help?"

• Not:"You're grounded from everything."

  Try:"Let's work out what happens next."